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The Athletics Nation Bad Oakland A’s Poetry Contest
Okay: which one of you Bay Area poets wrote this piece o’ littérature? An Athletics Nation Bad Oakland A’s Poetry Contest?! No way!
As posted on Athletics Nation:
It is with great pleasure, then, that I introduce the Athletics Nation Bad Oakland A’s Poetry Contest!
This is your chance to show the world your talent, or even better, your lack thereof. The many readers of Athletics Nation, posters and lurkers alike, have a diversity of interests and talents, but there are two things that tie us together: our love of the Oakland A’s, and the irresistible desire to write about it for posterity on the internets. Oscar Wilde once said that “All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling”, and I think we can all agree that we all have that. While it takes real talent to write a good poem, it takes passion (and an exceeding lack of talent) to write a truly bad poem.
The only rule of the Bad Poetry Contest is that there are no rules. Poems can be in any format, any length. They can be about A’s players past or present, the Coliseum, Stomper, the unsurpassed beauty of Susan Slusser, how much you hate the Giants or anything you’d like. I want to see your poetic (in)ability. The worse, the better. Mindblow, huh?
… Oh, you want some examples? Well, if you want something quick and simple, you can go with some short haikus:
Is there anything
in the world as beautiful
as a called strike three?
Can you Bernie Lean?
I can Bernie Lean, I can
I can Bernie Lean
The list of suggested forms even includes a few handy examples of A’s quatrains, sonnets, and limericks. To enter your Oakland A’s poem into the contest, visit Athletics Nation and post your poem as a comment on the bottom of the page by the end of the week. (Sixty-two and counting!)