Willie’s Wart

By Kenn Nesbitt b. 1962 Kenn Nesbitt
Willie had a stubborn wart
upon his middle toe.
Regardless, though, of what he tried
the wart refused to go.

So Willie went and visited
his family foot physician,
who instantly agreed
it was a stubborn wart condition.

The doctor tried to squeeze the wart.
He tried to twist and turn it.
He tried to scrape and shave the wart.
He tried to boil and burn it.

He poked it with a pair of tongs.
He pulled it with his tweezers.
He held it under heat lamps,
and he crammed it into freezers.

Regrettably these treatments
were of very little use.
He looked at it and sputtered,
“Ach! I cannot get it loose!”

“I’ll have to get some bigger tools
to help me to dissect it.
I’ll need to pound and pummel it,
bombard it and inject it.”

He whacked it with a hammer,
and he yanked it with a wrench.
He seared it with a welding torch
despite the nasty stench.

He drilled it with a power drill.
He wrestled it with pliers.
He zapped it with a million volts
from large electric wires.

He blasted it with gamma rays,
besieged it with corrosives,
assaulted it with dynamite
and nuclear explosives.

He hit the wart with everything,
but when the smoke had cleared,
poor Willie’s stubborn wart remained,
and Willie’d disappeared.

NOTES: with Linda Knaus

“Willie’s Wart.” © 2004 by Linda Knaus and Kenn Nesbitt. Reprinted from Rolling in the Aisles(© 2004 by Meadowbrook Creations) with permission from Meadowbrook Press.

Source: Rolling in the Aisles (2004)

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Poet Kenn Nesbitt b. 1962

POET’S REGION U.S., Northwestern

Subjects Living, The Body

Poetic Terms Common Measure

 Kenn  Nesbitt

Biography

Kenn Nesbitt was born in Berkeley, California. He grew up in Fresno and San Diego and attended National University in San Diego, where he majored in computer science.

Nesbitt’s poetry for children is “irrepressible, unpredictable, and raucously popular,” in the words of former Children’s Poet Laureate J. Patrick Lewis. Nesbitt’s poems frequently deal with humorous, relatable situations that verge on the madcap. He is the author . . .

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Poem Categorization

SUBJECT Living, The Body

POET’S REGION U.S., Northwestern

Poetic Terms Common Measure

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Originally appeared in Poetry magazine.

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