Just now I touched my chest
And felt my heart quivering there.
This must be one of the bad times.
I think it is quivering with remorse
And exhaustion. Once I saw a heart
Beating in a documentary. I was a very
Little girl and the sight disgusted me.
Throbbing and not stopping my heart betrays
Me and yet remains sure and true, a thing
Of nature. Earth bleeding
Its guts out on the sea floor exhausts
Me with remorse and shame, and yet I have to trust it
As wealth is proven by how terribly it devastates
Itself, and I am but one symptom among billions of the wealth
Of Earth. A tired feeling that is recuperated by a passing spaceship
Or an infinitude like fame but more universal. I will have to miss you
Earth; I miss you already. And yet when I touch myself whom I should
Not trust it is still only the heaviest and most jealous feelings that bind me to you, like blood.
Ariana Reines, “Science Fiction” from Mercury, published by Fence Books. Copyright © 2011 by Ariana Reines. Reprinted by permission of Ariana Reines.
(Fence Books, 2011)