After Suicide [A hole is nothing]
A hole is nothing
but what remains around it.
My brother stood
in the refrigerator light
drinking milk that poured
out of his head
through thick black curls
down his back into a puddle
growing larger around him.
My body stood between the
living room and kitchen
one foot on worn carpet
one on cold linoleum.
He couldn't hear his name
clouding from my mouth
settling in the fluorescent air.
I wanted to put my finger
into the hole
feel the smooth channel
he escaped through
stop the milk
so he could swallow it
but my body held
as if driven into place.
The milk on the floor
reflected the light
then became it.
Floated upward and outward
filling every shadow
blowing the dark open.
Matt Rasmussen, "After Suicide [A hole is nothing]" from Black Aperture. Copyright © 2013 by Matt Rasmussen. Reprinted by permission of Louisiana State University Press.
Source:
Black Aperture
(Louisiana State University Press, 2013)
