Changing What We Mean

By Eloise Klein Healy b. 1943 Eloise Klein Healy
Turning your back, you button your blouse. That’s new.
You redirect the conversation. A man
has entered it. Your therapist has given you
permission to discuss this with me, the word
you’ve been looking for in desire.
You can now say “heterosexual” with me. We mean

different things when we say it. I mean
the life I left behind forever. For you, it’s a new
beginning, a stab at being normal again, a desire
to enter the world with a man
instead of a woman, and of course, there’s the word
you won’t claim for yourself anymore, you

who have children to think of, you
who have put me in line behind them and mean
to keep the order clear. It’s really my word
against yours anymore in this new
language, in this battle over how a man
is about to enter this closed room of desire

we’ve gingerly exchanged keys to, but desire
isn’t what’s at issue anyway, you
say to me. Instead I learn a man
can protect you in a way a woman only means
to but never can, and my world is too new
when there’s real life out there, word

after word for how normal looks, each word
cutting like scissors a profile of desire—
a man facing a woman, nothing particularly new
or interesting to me. I’ve wanted only to face you
and the world simultaneously, say what I mean
with my body, my choice to not be a man,

to be a woman with you, forget the man’s
part or how his body is the word
for what touch can contain, what love means.
If this were only about desire,
you say, I’d still desire you.
But it isn’t passion we’re defining, new

consequences emerge when a man and desire
are part of the words we hurl, you
changing how you mean loving—this terrible final news.

Eloise Klein Healy, “Changing What We Mean” from Passing. Copyright © 2002 by Eloise Klein Healy. Reprinted by permission of Red Hen Press.

Source: Passing (Red Hen Press, 2002)

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Poet Eloise Klein Healy b. 1943

POET’S REGION U.S., Western

Subjects Relationships, Love, Men & Women, Social Commentaries, Gender & Sexuality, Desire, Break-ups & Vexed Love

Biography

Born in El Paso, Texas, Eloise Klein Healy grew up in rural Iowa. Healy's crisp, image- and narrative-driven poems often explore community, sexuality, and the nature of home. On the radio program Writers on Writing, Healy discussed her work’s attention to “the influence of place on people.” Addressing the role of the open-air California landscape and the details of daily life that often ground her poems, Healy noted, “The way . . .

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Poem Categorization

SUBJECT Relationships, Love, Men & Women, Social Commentaries, Gender & Sexuality, Desire, Break-ups & Vexed Love

POET’S REGION U.S., Western

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Originally appeared in Poetry magazine.

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