The Literary Mr. Mittens: Romney's Poetic Tendencies

Harper's writer Kevin Baker noticed something about presidential candidate Mitt Romney that other political journalists may have overlooked: "a literary current in Mitt Romney’s seemingly mindless ramblings—a stream-of-consciousness that reflects, perhaps, the romantic wistfulness of the middle-aged man facing his own mortality." Because Mr. Romney is busy with other pursuits, Baker has kindly ghost written a few poems in the spirit of the Republican campaign. Here's a taste:

The Love Song of W. Mitt Romney

“Ha, ha. We’re in the stretch, aren’t we? Look at those clouds. It’s beautiful. Look at those things.”

Let us go then, you and I,
While the clouds are stretched across the sky,
Like my campaign etherised upon a table.

In the room the women come and go
Talking of time in Mexico . . .

Stopping by Mitt On a Snowy Evening

“I love being in Michigan. Everything seems right here…the trees are the right height. The grass is the right color for this time of year, kind of a brownish-greenish sort of thing. It just feels right.”

Whose woods these are I do not know,
Their height is just the bestest, though.
He must be a Michigander
To make me prattle and meander.

Ha, ha. For more, head on over to Harper's.